9 Star Ki and Relationships

9 Star Ki is an immensely useful tool for understanding the underlying and often misunderstood dynamics that drive our relationships. Have you ever wondered why certain individuals just seem to rub you up the wrong way, or conversely, why you just can't seem to get through to certain types of people under certain circumstances? Many of us are aware that some relationships are naturally more harmonious and require less "effort" than others. However, understanding 9 Star Ki and the 5 transformations can be tremendously elucidating and help us not only to take blame out of the equation, but also to start to learn new tools to help us create more harmony in our lives. By understanding how 9 Star Ki effects the ways in which people perceive the world and the interplay of energies and elements between us, we can learn to appreciate and grow from some of the more challenging relationships in our lives, rather than seeing them as an annoyance or inconvenience.

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The 5 Transformations

The 5 transformatios decribe the way in which each of the 5 elements interacts with the others

Each of the 5 elements relates to the other elements in 3 distinct ways, called "transformations". Traditional Chinese medicine use these same transformations to help make medical diagnoses, as well as to prescribe appropriate treatments to bring the body back into balance.

There are 3 different types of transformation or relationship:

Same Element (also known as the 'Sibling Relationship')
Sibling Relationship

In this instance, both Energies share the same element. For example, it could be two 3 Tree Energies or one 3 Tree and one 4 Tree Energy. This combination tends to lead to a strong "sibling" relationship in which there is an effortless and profound understanding between both parties. There is a great potential for mutual understanding, compassion and harmony in the relationship as well as little antagonism or misunderstanding, although it can still happen, of course. However, this type of relationship typically does not result in very passionate romantic relationships as it may lack "spark" and chemistry. It can, however, lead to lifelong friendships and partnerships.

The Supportive Transformation (also known as the 'Cycle of Growth')
Supportive Transformation

In this instance, one of the Energies supports and nourishes the next. For example, Tree Energies support Fire Energies. This is also known as the "Parent / Child" relationship. On the surface, it may appear that it is more of a one-way street. However, in reality, it does work both ways, even if the bulk of the support flows from the parent to the child. This is typically a very stable relationship and as the elements are not the same, there is generally more chemistry than in the previous transformation we discussed, in which the elements are the same.

Traditionally, in parts of China and Japan, families would consult 9 Star Ki astrologers when arranging marriages in order to ensure the maximum possible harmony and compatibility between the married couple. The Supportive Transformation was considered to be the most harmonious and favourable combination.

The Supportive Transformation specific to the elements
Elements Description
Water > Tree The Water element nourishes the Tree element, helping it to grow; to develop its creativity and natural exploratory and pioneering nature. For example, Water people tend to show a natural fascination in the ideas of Tree people. Also, being flexible, they can keep up wiht the fast and dynamic pace of Trees, encouraging them and even providing additional ideas and inspiration.
Tree > Fire The Tree element nourishes the Fire by providing constant fuel to burn. For example, Tree people are often naturally complimentary and express their appreciation for others. This helps to boost the somewhat delicate confidence of Fire Energies, so that they can continue to burn brightly and inspire those around them.
Fire > Earth Fire element provides illumination, clarity, warmth and inspiration to Earth elements, supporting them in their endeavours. Earth people are not the most receptive to advice, especially from Tree people (from whom advice may seem like a threat). However, the warm, passionate, inspiring and gently elucidating quality of Fire tends to be much appreciated by those who are Earth element
Earth > Metal The steady, stable and reliable quality of Earth is extremely beneficial and supportive for Metal elements. Metal people are also quite reliable and steady by nature and may struggle a little with the more impulsive and dynaic Tree and Fire elements. Additionally, Metal people can, at time, be quite sharp in the way they communicate. Earth people are typically far more receptive and less impacted by Metal's communication style, resulting in good communication and understanding betwen these elements
Metal > Water Metal people bring great clarity to the Water element, which can, at times, get a little lost in deep waters and lose direction. Just as a knife cannot cut water, Water people typically do not feel cut by the generally more sharp quality that Metal people express. To the contrary, many Water people find the sharpness and directness extremely helpful and clarifying.
The Challenging Transformation (also known as the 'Cycle of Destruction')
Challenging Transformation

This type of relationship can easily be misunderstood. There is nothing inherently bad about the challenging or 'antagonistic' transformation. In fact, it is an essential part of life. In Traditional Chinese medicine, which uses the elements to understand the organs and their relationship to one another and to one's overall health, it is said that the challenging element is vitally important in order to calm down an overactive one which it controls, in order to bring balance back to the body. For example, the water element is said to govern the kidneys. During accuate kidney failure, there is also a negative impact on the heart (Fire element), which is no longer brought into balance by the Water element, resulting in an increased risk of heart attack.

This combination can be one of the most magnetic and results in the most personal growth. There is often a lot of natural chemistry between people with opposite elements. It is also the combination that is most likely to lead to misunderstandings and conflict. Sometimes this combination can lead to the element that is being challenged feeling thwarted and stifled. This is particularly the case if the challenging element is in a more powerful position emotionally or energetically. For example, a Tree person may feel as though all of their creativity - their "branches", so to speak - have been chopped down before they even had a chance to develop and explore any potential that may have been present. Or, a Fire person may feel their fire has been put out by a Water person, who wanted to do a deep dive into the depths of their terrain. However, as much as there can be greater conflict in this combination, it is in the resolution of this conflict that much progress is made and ultimately challenge leads to greater growth. It really comes down to the delicate balance between "carrot" and "stick".

The Challenging Transformation relative to the elements
Elements Description
Water > Fire The Water element runs deep and loves to explore the emotional world, flowing endlessly from one vantage point to the next. Fire people, on the other hand, are more comfortable with the perspective of the midday sun, where everything is illuminated and in plain view. What can therefore happen, is that Fire people can feel rather 'lost' in the world of Water people. They don't have much common ground and it can result in their flame going out. Water people also typically react to Fire's clearly defined opinions and perpsectives on situations, as well as what they view to be right and wrong or appropriate and not. To Water people, the opinions of Fires can sometimes appear harsh, judgmental, narrow-minded and lacking in empathy and they can feel compelled to draw their attention to the deeper, subtler, more diffuse layers of a situation, which can cause Fires to feel confused and misunderstood. However, when Fire people are out of balance, they can indeed become overly critical and narrow-minded and in those situations, the input of Water element brings balance, by injecting a much welcome dose of empathy and emotional sensitivity.
Tree > Earth Tree people love change and are constantly creating new solutions and ideas, which they pursue with passion. This can be extremely disruptive to Earth people, who tend to dislike change not instigated by others. Earth people can feel pushed by Tree people. One can easily invisage a vigorous young sappling breaking up the Earth in the spring time, as it begins its growth upwards. However, when out of balance, Earth people tend to get a bit stuck and stagnate and so the fresh, enthusiastic input of the Tree element is often the perfect remedy to get the Earth person unstuck.
Fire > Metal Metal people tend to be pragmatic, critical and clear and generally have a broad perspective and lots of common sense. However, they can also become overly rigid and stuck in one particular point of view. Fire Energies, who benefit from the perspective of the midday sun, often have a clearer, more balanced perspective than Metal Energies, as well as a warm, dynamic quality to them which is particularly good at gently melting and softening the rigidity of Metal people.
Earth > Water Water people, with their deep, flowing, exploratory nature, can sometimes become undisciplined, chaotic and too thinly spread. Without a container, they can lack direction and purpose. Earth people can be of great importance in helping to provide some structure and support to Water Energies. However, too much Earth element can be overly restrictive and rigid, thwarting Water's natural flexible, exploratory nature.
Metal > Tree Tree people are highly creative, forward-thinking individuals and can be quite pioneering. However, many of their ideas require a great deal of refinement before they are of use. Metal people, with their broad perspective, common sense and critical eye are especially good at seeing the potential pitfalls in the ideas brought forward by Tree people. When this interaction works in a balanced way, the results can be spectacular (one might think of a beautifully pruned tree). However, when exposed to too much or too agressive Metal element, Tree's natural creative powers may be stifled, leading to anger and frustration.

9 Star Ki and Sexuality

9 Star Ki can tell us some truly fascinating information about our sexuality and our relationships

9 Star Ki can tell us some truly fascinating and also incredibly useful information about our sexuality and our relationships with others. In the About 9 Star Ki section we discuss the concept of the Great Principle of 'Yin and Yang'.

Yin and Yang and its relationship to gender roles

For millenia society has tended to have fixed gender roles, making it hard for many men and women to find their true sexual expression

For millenia, society has tended to have quite fixed gender roles and associations which have not necessarily reflected people's true nature. In the majority of world cultures, men have, to a large extent, been expected to act like alpha males and have often felt the need to hide any natural traits that could be viewed as "feminine". Equally, women have been expected to adopt roles that society as deemed more "feminine" and have also often felt the need to hide any natural tendencies that didn't fit the mould handed to them.

Today we are developing deeper understanding about the cosmic Feminine and Masculine, or "Yin" and "Yang" Energies and how they affect human beings

Today many of these myths still persist; however, they are slowly fading, as we develop a deeper understanding about the cosmic Feminine and Masculine, or "Yin" and "Yang" Energies and how they affect human beings. In truth, men and women, in their most natural expression, can embody a wide range of masculine and feminine traits. Gender roles are nothing like as fixed as we traditionally believed them to be. Many gay and transgender people are leading the way in enlightening the world on these matters; however, many people still struggle with this, regardless of their sexuality.

Our Fundamental Energy and its relationship to sexuality

Our Fundamental Energy is intimately connected to our deeper sense of sexual security and identity

Our Fundamental Energy is intimately connected to our deeper sense of sexual security and identity and affects how comfortable an individual is likely to feel with his or her sexuality. Each of the nine Energies is considered either Yin ("feminine") or Yang ("masculine"). For example, 1 Water Energies is considered Yang, whereas 2 Earth Energies are Yin.

If a person's Fundamental Energy is in alignment with their biological gender, this tends to result in their having a deeper sense of security in regards to their sexuality.

If the Fundamental Energy is opposite to a person's gender, then this can result their having a more complex relationship with their sexuality and they may find it harder to relate to members of the opposite sex.

Our Character Energy and its relationship to sexuality

Our Character Energy has more of an influence on the way we express our sexuality overtly or superficially

Our Character Energy has more of an influence on the way we express our sexuality overtly or superficially. For example, it could affect how a person dresses, their mannerisms and behaviour with regards to attracting a mate, as well as their behaviour in relationships.

When a person's Character Energy reflects their biological gender, they are more likely to dress and behave in a way that is typically associated with that gender, sometimes to the extreme.

Conversely, if the Character Energy is opposite to biological gender, then the person typically feels comfortable with and can relate more deeply to members of the opposite sex, with or without the presence of a strong sexual attraction.

Note: for gay people, this works slightly differently. For example, if a gay man is very comfortable with his sexuality, is openly feminine in his expression and prefers to take a sexually passive role, then it's likely that the rules regarding gender can be reversed. Alternatively, for a gay man who is naturally more masculine and sexually active, then the above probably still applies. However, how masculine or feminine a person is is not necessarily a reflection of how they function sexually. For transgender people, it may be harder still to predict how 9 Star Ki influences sexuality. It is nuanced and the particularities are beyond the scope of this site.